It was a cold Sunday evening when I had fallen asleep while catching up on a book. I think that is what treats me best – a cup of tea with something good and powerful reading and all of me succumbing into the wraps of the quilt. Of late I have started practising the “mindful meditation” – while being involved in any activity – that keeps me focused and at much peace with myself…makes me feel a lot better. At that point, anything that could keep me selectively conscious was I were yet to receive her call.
And the phone rang…
But it was not her. Luckily I had the number saved and could not make it a given that I wouldn’t have even recognised the voice if the number was not saved. It had been years since I had talked to this person – who supposedly was (is) a very good friend of mine since school days.
I had kept this much touch that I knew all major events that had taken place in his life over the last 3 years so it was not like where to start with and what to talk about. We had things to talk and matters to discuss. We talked for a while – may be an hour or so. And it felt good, yes!
But as soon as I hung up, I felt punch in the pit of my stomach. Oh did I just stop being in touch with people – friends and family over the last 3years? I realised I actually did! I maintained minimalistic connection to probably make them feel that I am alive and at times for myself to know that they were doing well too.
May be it was good for the times they were but in the longer run, it seems too self-centred. And what happens is one day that phase gets over too. You are back to your normal life and you see yourself amongst the same set of people. It is probably then when you realise the importance of building and maintaining relationships.
When it sinks in that you end up giving too much weight to few years of your life and stop seeing things beyond that realm, you feel stupid. This can be really painful because it not only makes you stuck in the past, it also stops you from replenishing the old bonds or forming new friendships. It sounds silly at this point of time but take my words – give a real quick flashback. We all have been doing this – constantly. Forgetting people on the go and forming new bonds which too shall be lost in the race of living present. The saddest part of the story is that the virtual world makes you feel that you are still in touch. C’mon, you are totally not! You are simply connected.
There are friends, colleagues, neighbours or relatives who have been by your side through thick and thin and maybe not but it is good to be with them. For some reason you might have snapped away for a while. But always make an effort to stay in touch (I am not commenting on how much but yes do try). People will appreciate. And you will feel happy about your present.
I am not endorsing rampant networking 24×7. All what I mean is some people will themselves walk out from your life, some you would want to and there would be some who unknowingly or unintentionally will be left behind. Don’t forget to keep in touch with them because not everywhere you want to establish a connect jahan munaafa ho sake. We all want those bonds where we are ourselves and that is a big thing indeed!
That is just my side of the story – being too involved in something that I forgot that there is or will be a life beyond that very present. And others will have their own tales to share – too occupied, busy lives, job hi aisa hai yaar – kya karun, sometimes sheer worries or tensions make you take a step back. And whatever time remains you want to be aloof. But no reason is enough or justified. I wonder what illusions the virtual world can create.
There seems to be very fine line between disconnecting from the past/contributing to the present and yet maintaining the bonds that grew since we are born. I am glad that the phone rang that evening and some real conversation happened. I was caught red handed at the cusp of falling into the trap.
P.S. All we need to be is careful about what needs to be carried forward and left behind!